Friday, June 29, 2012

I GUESS I DESERVE IT

In one of my previous posts, I mentioned that I am now a freelance writer with www.Elance.com and having been there for more than a month, I can say that they are a professional website that really does give you access to the best online jobs out there. I have had one dream client to date and my payment was pretty reasonable. 

One problem that I do have, is that we have to continuously bid for new work and then the client chooses who they wish to work with. The thing is, it basically comes down to luck and I have the worst luck, like ever. People that have less freelancing experience is getting more jobs than I am. Not to mention that people that are just as new as me, if not newer to the Elance experience, is working on a regular basis, while I am left worrying about where this months salary is going to come from. 

When it comes to day jobs, I have surely had a few and all of them were pretty out there and with questionable employers. Now I am wondering if I did not do a stupid thing by deciding to work as a freelancer, instead of going to work at my local grocery store for a regular monthly income. Yes, I am an educated woman with a bachelors degree in agriculture, which I am unable to use by the way, but so what? There are better qualified people out there in the world that do normal everyday jobs.

I liked freelancing because I could do it from home, but it has left me with less time for novel writing and right now, my favourite and best loved characters seem like strangers to me and that just kills my moral.

Right now I just feel really down and out because I am broke and the life I could always flee to for escape, my novel writing, is not as welcoming as it used to be. I feel like a turned my back on something that I loved and now writers block is my punishment.  

Depressed is the only feeling I am feeling right now. Once again my mother is right, because she always tells me that writing does not pay the bills and right now, for me, that is absolutely true.

6 comments:

  1. I hate to see you down. I don't think it pays the bills unless it's a corporate writing job like for marketing or to add content to a web site. I think it takes years to write and perfect fiction to the point where a writer can make enough to pay the bills.

    My point is, you aren't alone.

    Most of the people I know that are writing novels have full-time jobs that have nothing to do with writing. They carve out 10 hours a week at night and weekends to keep working on their novel.

    If you need steady income, there's nothing wrong with getting a normal non-writing job.

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  2. I understand your discouragement. Keep writing. Keep trying. Keep doing what you love. Someday, it will work out.

    Play off the Page

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  3. Tonja - Thank you.

    Mary - Thank you so much.

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  4. I'm sorry to hear you're struggling. I wish there was some way I could help, some advice I could give... but I can't.

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  5. I'm sorry you're feeling that way right now, but hopefully it's just a temporary blip and you'll be getting more freelance work soon.

    I hope the novel writing starts to feel easier too!

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  6. Misha - Thats ok. Thank you for stopping by.

    Annalisa - Thank you for thinking of me.

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Feel free to leave comments. I love comments. But no spam, or hate speech. Your comments will be deleted, and I'd wish you a painful death, and your soul to turn to nothingness.

What is the point?

Today I was plagued with the idea, why? And why?  Everywhere these days there's a silent rule imposed by some invisible person or person...