DOWNSIDE

There is just one downside of being part of an online world or forum. Spammers/Hackers. I don't know what it is about me or my profile picture, But for some reason I receive emails from all kinds of people claiming they are writers digest community members, which I know they are not.

Reason being: Spammers always send you messages that say ''Please reply to this email'' and another reason is that I check out their profile pages and it usually has minimal information about them. Almost every single day I have a message like that and it usually starts with '' Hi, I saw your profile on the writers digest community forum...'' blah...blah...blah, you get the picture. So, be aware of those kinds of people. Important: Never reply to any of those messages or emails, ever.

People like that just really get on my nerves. As if life as an aspiring writer isn't tough enough, you still have to worry about people trying to scam you all the time.

SO FAR, SO GOOD

I started working today and it went well. Everyone was happy to see me, but whether they were really happy or just being nice for face sake, I will never know. Basically all I do is man the switchboard and help visitors with their inquiries.

I edited three chapters while sitting at my desk, today. It was a really quiet day and I was surprised I got so much done. I am a little bummed because I don't seem to have any energy left to write. And this was exactly what I was afraid of. Now that I am back at a demanding job I don't get time to write, accept on weekends, but at least I am getting a lot of editing done.

I am afraid to say it but things are actually going well for me for a change. Accept that one of my friends sent me one of those chain letters that say ''if you don't foreword this you will have a lifetime of bad luck''. Personally I don't believe in stuff like that and why the hell, would a friend send you crap like that? I wouldn't send another person an email like that. So, if anything happens to me and I am no longer blogging, then you know my friends little email got me.

I am going to edit a few more chapters. I feel inspired and determined to make that manuscript shine. I am actually excited to get to the stage where I get my first rejection letter. It sounds weird I know.

YEAH!

I got offered another temporary job! I have to start tomorrow and I will be working as a receptionist until they can replace the current one. Naturally, I will be applying for the job too, but it is a income. I can still edit my work and write, not as much as I would like but write none the less. I am so happy! I have a job! OK just for a few months, but still! It's a job.

EDITING

I started editing my first manuscript and so far I am actually enjoying it. I finished one chapter yesterday. so I am smiling. It makes me feel more at ease knowing I am doing something productive instead of waiting around for feedback. Like I said before, there are a lot of changes that need to be made in order for me to be satisfied. However, I don't want to totally gut it. I am just focusing on the spelling, sentence structures and making sure that the paragraphs flow into each other.

DIET HAS GONE TO HELL

I have been having an off few weeks and not only does my writng reflect it but also my scale. As you know I have become more healthy, counting calories and exercising regularly. But lately I eat what ever I want and I rarely exercise. I hate to admit it but my diet (lifestyle change) has gone to hell! I have gained two kilos since two weeks ago and now I feel really upset and I know what you are thinking. Stop eating so much!

I am trying really hard to get back into my focused state of mind. My writing is still going strong, but I am a lot more obsesive about my writing these days then I have ever been. No matter what happened to me today or the day before, I still go and write. It bothers my family a lot. I just feel that this is what I was meant to do. I know all apiring writers think and say that.

I have to get my diet as balanced as it has been for the past 7 months. I just have too. I felt as if I had so much more energy then I do now and I just felt better as a person too.

DRAMA QUEEN ALERT!

I was just playing around with a few ideas for my characters and I just realized my problem is that I tend to be a bit too dramatic. Damn this brain of mine. Everything is always so full of drama. I can't just let my two characters fall in love and that be it, no, there has to be death and sorrow before they can realize their feelings for each other. I don't know why I can't just write a scene that is not too overly complicated.

Maybe the fact that I am making things so emotionally complicated can be a good thing, right? Sort of like my own style? I don't know why, but I just don't believe in happily ever afters. Yes, my characters get a happy ending, but not like in fairy tales. There is always a compromise for happiness I think. So, naturally my characters would portray that.

But as you can read, once again I make things far more complicated then they really truly are. That is why I suck at creating a romantic or love scenes for my book. I just can't wrap my head around that scenario. It is coming along slowly, but I am sure I will get there, eventually. Urgh!

DAY AT WORK

I worked as a temporary receptionist today and it was OK. I was very busy, but I took a notebook with me and got a lot of writing done regardless. It is just very weird for me pretending to be smiley and friendly. I guess it comes with the job. Not that I'm not normally friendly, but I do fear people in general. I am a freak like that.

I got a few very good ideas while I was working. However I still struggle to make my two main characters appear in love. It is a lot harder then people think it is and yes, it is necessary for this story, seeing that it follows on my first one and as you can imagine the characters relationship evolves. I end up making a passionate scene sound really corny and the flow is all wrong. I still need a lot of work in that department. My first manuscript is going to need a lot of work too, before it is going to be anywhere near ready for submission.

Now I am torn. Do I write on the second novel or do I edit my first? What a dilemma. But I am going to try and do both. I really can't let either projects go. I know I am trying to do too much but I just can't lose momentum now.

I am still suffering from a lack of sleep, but when I write I hardly notice the fatigue. I don't mind losing sleep but I do mind the nightmares I have whenever I try to sleep. Overactive imagination I guess. For some strange reason I get my best ideas late at night, which is funny because I use to be one of those children (and teenager) who use to be afraid of the dark and now I seem to be more comfortable during night time then daytime.