CRAPPY ATTITUDE

I have been sitting in front of my computer for days trying to get myself to write but I am stuck...yet again. I am suffering from Crappy Attitude Syndrome unfortunately and as you can see...I diagnosed myself.

I guess everyone has good days and bad days but lately I have had a lot more bad ones. Especially when it comes to my writing. Is anyone else feeling the writing blues?

It is so bad that I am asking myself repeatedly whether or not I should pursue my writing further. I know I want to keep writing but this little demon of doubt on my shoulder is playing havoc with my brain.

Anyone got the cure for Crappy Attitude Syndrome?

IT TAKES AS LONG AS IT TAKES

I am one of those crazy people who like to plan ahead so that I am never surprised by anything unexpected. But do you know what? One can never plan or foresee everything.

That is one lesson I have learned recently and yes, sometimes planning ahead helps but other times it is just impossible. Take the writing of my latest novel as an example. I can't think so far ahead with this leading character. Things just happen to her as we go along. All my other novels were planned ahead, the skeleton if you will and then I would add the meat or flesh later. But this one I got to add a toe or a limb at a time. Ok, now I sound creepy.

I can't tell you if she will get hit by a bus or when it will happen. So now I can't stop writing because I constantly want to know what will happen to her next.

I lack that kind of trust and passion in my own life. I am too afraid most times to find out what is going to happen to me. So I always want to know what will happen to me in advance or in the future. That's why I read my horoscopes regularly and read the tarot cards.

But I need more patience and trust I suppose. Which brings me to my point. Everything happens in its own time, so things will happen when it happens and I have to stop trying to figure everything out all the time. Sometimes I just have to go with the flow.

NO MEAT...BUT THERE'S CAKE

The latest news with me is that I can't eat meat. I have been getting really sick whenever I do and my doctor can't find a medical answer as to why that is. So I have not been eating meat the past few weeks. Though, I am currently keeping to a vegetarian diet, I do not wish to refer to myself as a vegetarian because what if this meat intolerance thing passes and I eat meat again? I will not be able to handle all the hate mail I will be receiving.

Don't get me wrong, I have a huge amount of respect for vegetarians, but I grew up eating meat. It is a very important part of a meal in my country. But so far I am not missing meat. I do get to have an extra helping of dessert though.

Is anyone else perhaps getting this message when they access blogger?

Message: 'window.google.csi' is null or not an object

I can't access the blog Giggles and Guns, it simply refuses to load and I can't find a solution on the google forum. Just thought I might ask.

The writing is going slow. The querying is not going so well, but that is the way it goes. I just have to keep at it. Hopefully someone will request more material.

MANUSCRIPT ALERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hey Everyone! Just letting you know that Louise Fury of the L. Perkins Literary Agency http://lperkinsagency.com/ is looking for Young Adult Horror, Teen Sci-Fi and Paranormal Romance Novels. But check out her website http://louisefury.blogspot.com.

I am a free woman again. Another temporary job ended today so now the whole ''seeking employment'' things starts again. But oh well.

I don't know why but strangely enough I feel rather excited. Still working on the first chapter research thing and I started on a new novel. The writing is going a bit slow at the moment, but honestly, I didn't really have much time for writing.

That's all from me for now.

IT IS ALL ABOUT THE DESK

Inspiration has been missing lately. No matter what I did, I just could not focus. But...thanks to my mother's wonderful suggestion, I changed the location of where I write.

I have moved Oscar, my trusty personal computer, to my writing desk in my room and now we are quietly tucked away at the back of the house, away from all the noise and endless interruptions.

I even got a new idea for a book, of which I have already completed the first chapter. So At least June is beginning well for me. Thanks to a new desk.

On Wednesday my temporary contract will be expiring at the cellar and I will once again be unemployed. Though, I have already started applying for other jobs.

Oh! And I started querying again today. Got a knot in my stomach but I know it needed to be done.

MENTAL FATIGUE

After the A-Z challenge I told myself that I was going to take a little time off and I guess I did, from blogging at least. My job is so mentally demanding and now also physically demanding that I am still feeling drained.

I have not written anything in weeks and I am so scared that all my creativity has been used up. Silly I know…but that’s me.

One piece of good news is that all my editing is done. 9 drafts later and this will be the manuscript I will query. I will not be editing again, unless an agent or publisher asks me to. So this is Immortal: New Beginning’s last shot at getting me an agent and after at least 50 rejections I will put it away.

I have written one or two other stories during this year and last year but I truly think this one is my best work to date. So at least I am going to start querying again.

I don’t know what is going on with me but I feel so out of touch with the whole blogging world. I apologize that I have not been stopping by anyone’s blogs. I really hope to get out of this slump soon. I need to write and more importantly, I want to write.

VERSATILE BLOGGER AWARD

I received this awesome award from Lea at http://wantonredheadwriting.blogspot.com/

Ok, so this award comes with rules...

1. Thank and link to the person who nominated you.

Thank you Lea at http://wantonredheadwriting.blogspot.com/. I am really happy to receive this award and I am also very surprised. I am doing my happy dance as I type.

2. Share 7 random facts about yourself.

- I love bubblegum milkshakes.

- My favourite food is burgers and potatoes.

- I have a tattoo on the inside of my left wrist.

- I prefer having my hair short (as in pixie style short).

- I love history.

- I never back down from an argument.

- I am an animal person.

3. Pass this award on to 5 deserving bloggers.

I don't like this part because I always feel bad that I couldn't pass it on to everyone. But rules are rules so here goes...

Heather http://hmgardner.blogspot.com/

Brianna http://pocketfulofplaydough.pageek.com/wordpress/

Tonja http://tonjasmusings.blogspot.com/

M.J. http://haleine-paperbackwriter.blogspot.com/

Mary http://gigglesandguns.blogspot.com

4. Congratulate the above mentioned people on receiving their award.

I will go do so immediately. Thank you for stopping by.