AT THE MOMENT

It is late in the afternoon and the sky is filled with black clouds. The rain is pouring down by the bucket loads at the moment and the writing juices is flowing freely. I don't know exactly what it is about the rain that makes it the best weather to write in. Maybe it is because the dark clouds appeal to the darkness inside me. I am not sure. I guess it could also be because my characters always have an unknown darkness to themselves as well.

The freelance writing jobs are scarce at the moment. I haven't been able to get one in a month, but I am still trying. I guess the news of finding an agent could not have come at a better time, as it takes some of the pressure of being unemployed off my shoulders. My family are not so pushy about me going out and getting a real job at the moment. Though, the fact that I have an agent won't save me for long.

THERE IS ALWAYS CONSEQUENCES

I just finished watching The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo with my family and I have to admit, I am feeling a little unsettled and upset after watching it. The story was good, but there were just a few graphic scenes in there that really got to me. I guess what makes things even worse is that I have an active imagination. It is kind of a given because I am a writer.

Maybe I should rather read the books instead.

WHAT A MESS

I am currently busy with the second draft of my second book and let me tell you, it is a mess. I was in such a hurry to get the first draft typed up, that in certain chapters I am missing vital words to complete sentences and certain areas are still going to need a lot of work.

It is times like this that I am really happy that there is something like the editing process, though, I am happy that that part is still a long way off. I am not much of an editor, if I must be honest. One thing is for sure though, I am not going to have as many drafts as I did of the first book. It was close, if not more than twenty different drafts. I just kept changing and rewriting.

For now I have to decipher my own words and figure out how I am going to make the story whole. But this is the fun part. I am definitely a writer and not an editor.

So, what are you guys up to?

SO MUCH FOR THAT

It is my oldest sister's birthday tomorrow and for once I helped out my pastry chef sister with all the goodies for tomorrow and let me tell you, it is going to be a sweet, high calorie feast, as we are big on desserts in my family. I have been trying to live a healthier lifestyle, but I have also been trying to get fit, as I tend to be overweight. As if it is not hard enough trying to motivate myself to exercise, now I will be in cake and cheesecake heaven. Yum!

But don't worry, I plan on going back to the garden next week, even though it is twice as overgrown as the first part. I am going to go in and clean out those weeds. What are you guys up to?

IT IS JUST ME

When it comes to writing, I am very self-conscious about everything that I write. Even though not all my blog posts reflect it, I read the content over and over to make sure everything is as it should be. Needless to say, I also fuss a lot about every single page that I write, when it comes to my novels. I guess that is probably why I never post excerpts of completed manuscripts.

The fact that I worry and obsess a lot about my work no longer bothers me as much, especially since I know that there are quite a few other writers who can relate. I just wish my family will stop reading over my shoulder as I type. It just causes me to freak out over this imperfect piece of work that still needs love, attention and plenty of editing.

The Insecure Writers Support Group was created by the wonderful and talented author and blogger, Alex J. Cavanaugh. You guys can visit Alex over at http://alexjcavanaugh.blogspot.com.

THICKER SKIN - ALL AROUND

When it comes to pursuing your dreams, it can be a lot tougher than you first thought. The reason for it being tough is not always because things are different than you thought, but the loved ones that have to go through this difficult journey with you, does not always understand what you are going through or why.

When I say that they might not understand what you are going through, I am talking about them getting a bit negative about the reality of your current situation. Sometimes they may say or do things that discourage you and that can make doing what you want a whole lot harder.

I am not just writing this post from the comfort of my own home and my own desk, but I know what it is like first hand to have those you love most, doubt you and your potential, not to mention the logic of your dream. Just because they do not understand what it takes to achieve your dream, does not make you or your dream impossible.

I though about this post last night, because I always have this problem and if any of you out there have this problem too, then I want you to know you are not alone. You can do this. You just have to stay strong, as nothing worth having ever comes easy. Being a writer is always tough and I doubt it gets any easier the further your career progresses. 

UNFIT - WRITING STYLE

I cannot believe how hard it has become for me to keep up with my mind, when it comes to writing. There was a time where I could write for hours on end and possibly write thousands of words. Now, I am struggling to just write one page.

I think that I have become mentally unfit, if that is even possible. I have been writing a lot of short articles while freelancing, ranging from 150 words to 450 words, all about various non - fiction topics. I guess I have gotten out of practice when it comes to writing novels.

It is definitely time for me to get back into the swing of things because I have so much I want to write, but somehow, I am just unable to get it all down. My mind is even struggling to keep thinking for long periods of time, which is definitely worrying. But I am sure it is nothing that a little practice cannot fix.

I am starting to wonder if freelancing and fiction writers just don't mix.