READ A BOOK, WRITE AND READ SOME MORE

I am feeling a little conflicted at the moment.  I don't know what type of story I want to write at the moment. I always leaned towards romance because I have never experienced it before. Yes, we all have crushes, but I have never been in love and I suppose that is why I have been writing about it the past 5 years. 

Having said that, I am leaning towards darker stories and themes these days. Don't ask me why, I guess I have been reading too many Stephen King and James Patterson novels. Though, I can't really see this type of story unfolding right before my eyes as I did with the romance novels. Writing something different is hard.

As I am yet unpublished, I suppose it is okay to switch genres, because lets be honest, I have one romance novel with an agent and even the publishers don't like it. Nobody wants to see more. So maybe I am just not a good romance writer. Maybe I am yet to find the genre that I should write in. 

This weekend I am going to do some reading, just to relax and recharge my batteries and then I am going to try and get some writing done. If the writing does not happen, then I can always read some more and I can call it research. 

Just a thought...What are you writing right now?

SOME PEOPLE SHOULD JUST SHUT UP

I am at a loss of what to do today. I have been at my new job for almost three months and my new co-worker is making no effort to accept me or treat me with respect. She has made it clear that she does not like fat people (I am fat by the way) and she has this way of using humour to insult me.

I have confronted her and once, after being completely overwhelmed by annoyance and anger, went ape shit on her and letting a really bad cuss word slip, which is completely not like me, but she still did not stop. She lightened up for a while, but then she just went back to her bitchy ways. I talked to my boss and all that he said was that I had to understand that not everyone was as professional as me. I am the kind of person that goes to work, to work. My job requires a lot of focus and concentration, as I process data that has a direct impact on other people’s money.

I have been called a cold person, but that is because I am very focused and determined and I take my job, whatever it might be, seriously. I guess I can be seen as too professional, but that is just who I am. Now I don’t know what I should do. I can’t quite, I have bills to pay. Other jobs are damn scarce and this chick (yes, she is a woman) thinks she is my boss when we are actually on an equal level, she just happens to have been in the same job and position for the past 10 years. She acts like she owns me or something.

Of course I bud heads with anyone who tries to force their opinion or ideas down my throat. I have mentioned to her that I want to do my job and then go home. I am not here for drama or to make friends. I get paid to be professional and do my job to the best of my ability. Even my boss said that that was why he hired me. Today I just kept speaking my mind which just made things worse.

I honestly feel tired emotionally because I don’t want to deal with other people’s crap. Why can’t they just do their job? I think I might have to go through the proper channels and make an official complaint or something. Oh, did I mention that I am only on a temporary contract and that she is permanent? Apparently all new data capturers are only given temporary contracts, which can be extended every few months. I honestly do not want to be at the company 

any more. I feel like I was lied to about many things in my interview as most people at the company do not know what the word professional means.  I was told to adhere to certain rules and procedures but most people in the company do not. It feels like I am on a different planet certain days.

I felt this way after the first month and kept it all in, till now, but I had to share. I am just not the suffering in silence type. I thought the problem was me at first and I tried to do things differently in every other way, but still, the same result. I have been having he worst luck with jobs the past few years that I just don't know what to do. 

Aside for blogging, things have not gone good on the writing front. Not to mention that I have not heard from my agent in a few months, so I guess it is just bad news for me all around lately. But A-Z was great. It kept my mind off most of the work drama. 

THE KEYBOARD DRAMA

My trusted computer keyboard has recently started to cause problems and it was reaching the point where the letters, on them, were no longer existent. So naturally I started to do some research about buying a new one. Man, was I in for a rude awakening. There were really affordable ones and there were also very expensive ones, which I am still confused about as I still do not know why they are so expensive.

So, I went to one of the local stores and first of all, finding someone that works in the computer products department was a task and then trying to get that person to explain to me what the differences were between the various keyboards, was even more taxing, as he did not know either.

So there I stand, having to make a choice between the various brands (which were few, thankfully) and the various price ranges (which varied drastically). In the end, I simply demanded that he open a box of each, as the store did not have any on display and I typed on it to feel the various keys. I finally made my choice, as the other options keys were too close together. I got home and started typing and all was fine, until I started working on a chapter and I noticed that the shift button was the same size as all the other buttons. On my old keyboard, it was twice the size. I am sure I will get used to the small shift button eventually. So much for trying to be smart about it.

How do you choose the right keyboard for you? Got any computer stories to share? 

THOSE ARE THE BOOTS FOR ME

I have been on the particular mission to find the perfect pair of boots. Now I should mention that I have a very particular taste. I like the biker style boots with the studs and buckles which is not really the type of boots which are in fashion.

Now, because I favour that type of style, I tend to share that particular taste in footwear with many of my main female characters, mostly because it is unusual, in my opinion. I always find people who ask me why I don’t choose boots that are more feminine, when in my opinion I don’t see how buckles make an item more masculine. Why can’t women like buckles too?

After a year and several months of searching, I have found the perfect pair of boots. I love them and yes,  thankfully that is real leather. 

WE SURVIVED! (IWSG)

This month I am not feeling insecure about anything. I feel positive about my life and writing and why? Because A-Z has done wonders for me. I have met new friends, while also getting to know the ones I already have much better. I was also kept so busy with the challenge that I could forget about most of the personal crap that went on in my life.

Thank you to everyone who visited me during the month of April and who always had a few kind words to share. You guys give me inspiration and the kind of motivation that I sometimes require in the bucket loads. You guys are amazing.

We survived A-Z people and that is not an easy thing to do. But we did it, congratulations!

The Insecure Writers Support Group was created by the wonderful and talented author and blogger, Alex J. Cavanaugh. You guys can visit Alex over at http://alexjcavanaugh.blogspot.com.

Z = ZEST

Zest is the kind of way I wish to live my life. I want to take the bull by the horns. I want to get up each morning and live life to the full, like it is my last day. I think sometimes we need that, a new or renewed zest for life, just to keep things in perspective. Though this might be the end of this challenge, let us take on our lives, or our blogging with the kind of energy that is fitting of a tornado. Lets keep going and striving forward and have nothing stop us, not until we decide to stop. 

Y = YOU

It is not selfish to sometimes put your needs ahead of others. There needs to be a balance and being led to believe that spending any time on yourself or by yourself is selfish, then so be it. There comes a time when you need to be by yourself in order to regain your focus and your energy. It is good to be kind to others, but it is equally important to be kind to yourself as well. It is okay to put yourself first every now and then.