A FUNERAL, SOME WRITING AND WORK

We went to my aunts funeral today and the whole event was sad—beautiful in its own way, but still sad. I am not going to the second funeral this weekend, as my brother and sister are leaving for the funeral tomorrow morning (because it is about 8 hours away from where we live) and I need to work. There are deadlines at work and my boss didn't even want to give me off for the funeral today, but did so because it was a close relative.

On another note, I find myself smiling a lot these days for no apparent reason. I have all these ideas for my book and I am excited about this idea or concept that I have. It is a love story, but close to the same style of what one would see in a chick flick. It is about a kind of love that is so strong that it will move through time. I am still working things out and trying to make it all make sense and match. I am going to start working on an outline this weekend and hopefully I can bring this story in my head, to life.

Work is not bad, but the people I work with are unbearable. I find myself smiling everywhere, except there. There is just not a whole lot to smile about at work. But hey, I need to earn a living right? I have applied to three different recruitment agencies to help me find a new job, so hopefully in the next few months I will find something new. I am holding out for a new job before I resign, but the other day I almost gave in my resignation after people had been awful to me. I just have to learn to stick things out no matter what. I am not used to this type of environment, but there has to be a reason why I have been exposed to it right? Who knows what is awaiting me in my future.

I am not sad right now or anything. The new book idea has me smiling. What are you up to?

THE THRILL OF IT ALL BLOGFEST ENTRY

Thank you Tara and Heather for hosting this awesome blog hop.

When it comes down to the biggest thrill that I have ever experienced, it still has to be the day that I got an email from my literary agent. I felt something close to butterflies and I felt like everything was going right. But I have to admit that to this day, I get a similar thrill whenever I see that someone has taken the time to leave a comment on my blog or has decided to follow my blog. I have butterflies, I feel humbled and happy to be alive.

GOOD NEWS AND BAD NEWS

The bad news...I am sort of in a weird spot at the moment. Two of my aunts have passed away this week and I need to attend their funerals. One funeral is in town and the other is halfway across the country. I always hate funerals because they are so sad and I never quite know what to say to the grieving family, because at my dad's funeral I hated the very fact that everyone wanted to talk to me, sympathize and hug me. I just wanted to be on my own. Of course my boss already gave me grief when I asked him to go to the one funeral and this morning we found out about my other aunt dying, so now I have to try and get off again. My boss is such an ass!

Good news is...that when I woke up this morning, I woke up with a story in my head. I feel like I have to write it as fast as possible before the urge to not want to write takes over again. I want to make sure I get it written, because I can see the whole story unfold in front of my eyes like it is a movie. Now, this has happened to me before and I had actually managed to finish writing the book. Lately I had started a book and had not finished it. Now, I am writing again and I love the feeling of the writing process, wanting to know more and watching the story unfold before my very eyes.

The Thrill of It All Blogfest

The awesome and talented Heather Gardner and Tara Tyler will be hosting The Thrill of It All Blogfest on the 24 of June. It is going to be super fun and there is still time to sign up at the linky list below.

All you have to do is share a thrill on the 24^th of June and it could either be real or fictional. You just have to keep it to a paragraph or less. Just so that you know, there will be awesome prizes up for grabs. If you want to know more then simply go here.

I have already signed up and I am ready and excited. I just have to think about my blog entry. Hope to see you there. 

PHASES

As a writer I must admit I have found that my life and writing goes through various phases all the time. My life is either stable or changing continuously. Because I tend to be a little obsessive compulsive, ever changing circumstances and surprises and things like that are my personal idea of hell. I can do repetitive things over and over and life is fine. Change something and my day or life is ruined. I don't know why I am like that. I just am. When it comes to my moods, I am either in my content phase or my tortured phase, most days I am in my tortured phase, as that is just how I am. I am not an overly happy person, but I am not the kind of person to be mean or rude to someone else unless you did something to offend or upset me. I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt at our first encounters. Offend me or be rude and your chance is out the window. 

As for writing. I am either inspired to write or not. If I am in the writing mood then I can knock out a first draft of a book in two to three months. If I lack inspiration or the desire to write, it can take me weeks or months to get out of this mental slump and get back in the writing saddle. At the moment I am in the writing slump phase. At least I am going through some of the other books that I have written and editing here and there. I am not really sure about their potential, but it doesn't hurt to take a look again. I am not really feeling very enthusiastic about the editing, but at least I am doing something.

I am also more in the reading phase than the writing one. I am totally loving Janet Evanovich's writing and wishing that I could have her brain. To think, I would never have read any of her work if my sister had not bullied me into reading her books. I had been sure that I would not like her work and I now love it. So, I was wrong and Janet Evanovich rocks! I am obsessed with the Stephanie Plum novels and finding myself wishing that her leading men existed in real life, because they sound so sexy and I want someone like Morelli or Ranger for myself. Yum!

I think that it is great that I at least understand myself and my phases, unfortunately, most people don't get me. My mother is always asking me why I can't be more like the other women my age and I just shrug my shoulders. Apparently I look like the sweet and innocent girl that never does anything wrong. Unfortunately, I  don't see myself like that, I don't think like that at all and most importantly, my personality could not be further from that stereotype either. I like wearing black, I love wearing biker boots with studs and buckles, I love tattoos, even though I only have one and rock music speaks to my soul.

What are your phases like? Do you have any?

FREE E-BOOK, THAT SADIE THING

That Sadie Thing by Annalisa Crawford is available for free download today here. Please, guys, show her your support and download your free copy. If you do not have a Kindle, you can get the free Kindle reading application here.

You can even visit  Annalisa over at her blog, here.

I AM JUST STUPID

You guys know how I hate my current place of employment, right? And you guys remember how I did not fit in there and people were, or should I say are mean to me? Well, my contract is expiring at the end of this month, so my boss brought me a contract of renewal and I signed on for another year...

I just could not say no, at least not until I have another job. Please don't be mad at me. I am going to give in my resignation as soon as I find another job, in the meanwhile, I will still get paid. I need the money, even though I believe my co-workers are the spawn of satin, out to destroy anyone with free will and who can think. Though, today I felt like telling my boss to stick his job where the sun don't shine and I called my co-worker a mediocre human being. It was not nice, but she deserved it, honest. My boss actually told me that I had a perfectionist mentality and that I had to lower my standards to be able to work at the company. Can you believe that? All I am telling myself is, "get a new job and until that happens, save as much of your salary as possible." 

Another things is, in two months my contract with my agent will expire too and unless my book sells in the next few months, I will be back in the query trenches or back in the writing another book to submit mode. Still too early to tell. 

Not doing much on the creative front these days, just reading. I love reading, but I wish the writing would kick in. Most people would use their crappy experiences as writing inspiration, me...I just feel sorry for myself and I don't have the energy to use it. Besides, I don't want to make them feel special by writing about the meanies. 

What are you guys up to?