THAT IS GOOD

I have finally gotten a new freelance job. I joined www.elance.com two weeks ago and that is how I got this job. This is a wonderful website if you want to find freelancing jobs from any working sector imaginable. of course, I should mention that the company Elance gets a percentage of any money that you make. I find it to be completely fair as they provide a safe job finding experience, not to mention the best freelancing jobs out there, as well as guaranteed payment.

I am now working my butt off and taking it all one day at a time. That is the only thing that one can do.

SOMETIMES SLEEP IS THE ANSWER

Last night I had a dream about the novel that I have been avoiding. I dreamt that I was actually one of the characters and do you know what? When I woke up, I was really excited to start working on it again. I guess in my subconscious, I really wanted to do it, but I was just putting things of repeatedly. Though, for this novel, I like writing the second draft during the night. It just feels better and I feel more at ease and comfortable.

I have also been doing a bit of dancing on the exercise front and I really do feel happier, getting some exercise in me. Now it is just a matter of keeping it up. So, how are you guys doing?

HOW WEIRD IS THAT?

Last night I took my place at the computer, feeling a little scared, as I clicked on the first draft of one of my previously written stories, which I have not read in a very long time. It has been a year since I completed it and in some some strange way, I felt no connection to this piece of work. In one way I could almost not believe that I had written it. 

Though, I should mention that all my signature mistakes reminded me just who wrote it. Getting back into the novel writing mode, after trying desperately to play the freelance one, has been a lot harder then I thought. Somehow I thought I could just flip the switch and then I could turn off the one side of my brain and then later, turn the other back on again. 

Novel writing is and will always be my first love and the desire to be a successfully published novelist is still my main driving force. But, just to make things clear, freelancing it what I do to pay the bills and if I can gain more credibility as a writer, then that is good too. 

So now it is back to writing the second draft of my long lost manuscript. Last night I had to stop at page 3, as my cat wanted attention. As you know what Katy wants, Katy gets, or else, you get the claws. 

A FRESH START FOR ME

I am happy to be writing about all the stuff that I want. I have been really negligent of my writing in general. Though, this time with freelancing, I should be able to have more control over when I have to complete assignments and by how many I take on. Before I was just burning myself out.

I have just noticed one thing in particular. I now have that famous squire butt! I have literally just been sitting on my rear end. No exercise what so ever and even with a vegetarian lifestyle, I still managed to gain a ton of weight. Probably because I end up going for quick and instant food, which always has a ton of fat. My favourite bad food would be French fries and a lot of it. I just cannot believe that my butt has actually taken up the form of my chair. That is just sad.

So, now I am willing to actually eat breakfast every morning, my least favourite meal of the day and actually work exercise into my daily routine. I have to! I am 26 years old. I am supposed to be in my prime...or at least something like that.

So, have any of you guys had any shocking awakenings? Come on, be honest.

I AM JUST SAYING

I have not been a very good blogger this year and I finally know why it has been so hard to keep at it. I have not been writing about the things that I want. I have read on the Internet that it is better to maintain a professional blog if you are a wanne be writer. The thing is, you never know whether a publisher or agents might stumble across your blog and find your blog to be boring and inappropriate. Well, if that is the case then think what you will, because I need to write about what pops into my head. I am that kind of person.

Granted, not everyone likes that I blog about all the drama going on in my life, but that is what my blog is about.  My blog even stated it, right at the top. I am a writer that wishes to do it permanently.  I am sorry if I am upsetting anyone, but that is the only way I can remain sain.

In terms with what else is new with me...I joined www.elance.com. You can join for free or sign up to their membership options and basically they give you access to all the great freelance jobs out there, that you would not normally have access to. So what is the catch? As a free member, like myself, you only get to bid on 15 projects a month. Yes, the freelancers have to bid for jobs, but I have only been a member for a week and I am yet to make my first bid. If ever I do feel that I am not getting the best deal, I can sign up for a membership or even end my membership and go to another site like www.odesk.com. The best thing about Elance is that they have an escrow. Meaning, your money is held by a third party, so that you will still get paid, even if your client thought of withholding payment. Keep in mind, that you only get paid if the client is satisfied with your quality of work.

Oh and I started another blog. Why I did it, I am not yet sure. I just wanted to use that domain name before anyone else did. I guess I was hoping to use it once I was a published writer. As I would not be able to still blog on daily drama of an aspiring writer. I barely blog over at my new blog www.mureesdup.blogspot.com.

IT IS JUST TOUGH, ALL AROUND

I am in the weirdest part of my writing career ever. It is the first time in months that I have been unable to creatively put a sentence together, aside for blogging. When I worked as a freelancer I was forced to write everyday, whether I wanted to or not and whether I had an idea about what to write or not. 

We all know that that is spilled milk, as I was "let go" from that job. Now I have all the time in the world to write again and I just cannot manage to write anything. I have had writers block before, but not like this. I seem to be lacking the writing factor. Right now my creativity feels like it has been sucked down a dark and deep hole. 

Just to keep myself on the positive road of seeking representation for my novel, I sent away queries to the last few agents on my list that represents paranormal romance writers. I did everything I could for this novel, so if it fails to acquire representation, then I have to start editing one of my other books that I have written previously and hope it fairs better.

The really strange thing is that there are other writers out there, better writers than myself, that are going through the exact same thing. So I guess whether you are talented or not, you just have to grind your teeth, cross your fingers and hope your turn to achieve success will come. 

IS YOUR TIMING RIGHT?

One thing that I have never been a fan of is timing. If you are a writer, then there would have been some point in your writing life, that you have had the words, “the time is not right now,” directed towards you. I do not think that there is something worse than when you are ready to submit that labor of love and someone mentions that your timing is wrong and that you should either wait a few years till the same market demand shows up again, or abandon your project and write something new.

I just try my best and hope that the timing is on my side regardless.

The Insecure Writers Support Group was created by the wonderful and talented author and blogger, Alex J. Cavanaugh. You guys can visit Alex over at http://alexjcavanaugh.blogspot.com.